I am working until 4:30 today and am then heading straight home to pack all of this:

That’s right. I am going to attempt to fit all of  THAT into my carry on suitcase. Wish me luck!


…but people make it so f-ing hard sometimes!

Let me explain, on Monday me and a friend went to get pedicures. We went right after I got off work and so I was wearing my work clothes. This is the outfit


It was a warm day so I thought I would wear a dress and actually felt cute in it!

Well within 5 minutes of walking into the nail salon the lady asks me if I am pregnant. Ummmm, what? I didn’t even know how to react and still don’t. But comments like that are part of the reason I am self conscious.

A moment that made me feel better: A girl, also getting a pedicure, complimented my dress as I was walking out. I told her the story and she said she totally disagreed.

Moral of the story: I will not wear that dress again until I lose at least 10 lbs. I better get on it cause my closest selection is becoming limited.


June 29, 2011

I know this is a few days late but I wanted to recap my weekend. It was a fun one!

I live in Coeur d’Alene, which happens to be the home of the Ford Ironman! If you do not know what an Ironman is, let me explain, it is the most hardcore triathlon out there and consists of a 2.4 mile swim, 112 bike, and 26.2 mile run. About 2500 athletes competed at this years event. Crazy.

Me and a friend volunteered as security for the event.


Official Security yo!

We had to be downtown at 6:30 but left at six to try to find decent parking. Since the majority of the roads were shut down so we ended up parking far away and hiking down. We tried really hard to be on time but the crowds were crazy! So we ended up being 15 minutes late.

We were in charge of keeping spectators out of the swim to bike transition area.



The view of Lake CDA from our post

I tried to get a good picture of all the swimmers but I couldn’t leave my post!

The rumor was that the water was only 52 degrees when the race coordinators had informed the athletes prior to the start it was 57. All the athletes had wetsuits on but they still looked so disorientated coming out of the water. And a few had to drop out and be taken medical tent.  The fastest swimmer was out of the water in 49:00 minutes and the cutoff time is 2:20. Three people missed the cutoff but I believe they let them complete the event regardless.

Once we were done there we went to drink! haha We ate breakfast and then promptly began drinking some adult beverages Smile It only took about 4 drinks before the first pro athlete was pasting the finish line! He was from Australia and finished in just about 8 hours.

At that point we had been out in the sun for 9 hours so we took a break and went home. After a nap I was ready to get back to drinking. haha No, we really wanted to head back down there to see the final athletes pass the finish line. The cutoff time is midnight, a total of 17 hours of swim, bike, and run! There was two people, a man and a women who made it just in time. In the final stretch there are bleachers full of people cheering them on and then as they cross the finish line and receive their medal the crowd chants “You are an Ironman.” It really is an amazing moment.

Then midnight hits and the crew starts to tear everything down and everyone starts to go home. But about a minute later another women comes in but sadly she missed the cut of time. This made me so emotional! To go through all of that to come up a minute short! Everyone cheered for her and I heard some people in the crowd say she would still get a medal, etc.

All the athletes who participate in the Ironman are incredibly inspiring. Maybe some day I will be crazy enough to take it on, but for now I perfectly happy watching and drinking for 17 hours!

Workout Recap

June 27, 2011

6/20: Swim ~1 hr

Done! Here are the sets I did at Master Swim:

Warm up: 200 free, 200 kick: 150 free and 50 breaststroke

5 50s free

Easy 200 free

5 100 kick free

6 100 pull free

50 cool down

Total Meters*: 2,000

I felt fine while I was swimming but unfortunately this work out (the 6 100 kick specifically) really tweaked my knee. This affected my workouts for the rest of the week.

*My gym decided to switch things up on us and changed the lane lines from yards – which is what you will find at most pools to meters. 1 meter is longer than 1 yard. Plus the lane I was in did not have a real lane like to separate it from the other lanes so the water was super choppy. I guess it was good practice for when I will be swimming in the lake!

6/21: Run/ Walk 2 m 2.5 m/ Weights

I walked the majority of this.

6/22: Swim ~1 hr / Easy ~4 m bike

This was my bad day! I slept through my alarm and missed Master Swim L and did not have time after work to make it up. But I did ride my bike to and from the coffee shop!

6/23: Bike ~6 m / Weights JM’s 30 day shred

I really want to do JM’s 30 day shred more! I loved it! It made me sweat and my muscles were sore the next day.

On the bike ride I rode to Downtown Coeur d’Alene and got to see the Ironman setup. The energy downtown during Ironman is amazing, I love it!

6/24: Swim ~ 1 hr / Run/Walk 2 m Rest

This was my last day of classes for Summer Session 1 so I had way too much homework to do and instead of stressing decided to take a rest day.

6/25: Rest Bike Group ~30 miles

6/26: Bike Group ~30 m Volunteered for Ironman

This involved lots of standing so it was a workout 🙂

After having a bad day yesterday, I have decided that today is all about positivity. So here are a few thing I am loving about today.

The Sun, this morning started with rain, thunder and lightening. Now it is beautiful and I am going to go for a bike ride.


Iced Coffee, I love it with just a splash of soy milk. For some reason the bitterness doesn’t bother me when its iced, if its warm I have to throw in some Splenda.


My hair – I did nothing except brush it this morning and it dried with a nice little wave to it. I love when a have a good hair day with no effort!


My new teal cardigan that I got on sale. Makes me fell like summer Smile 


Sick of pictures of me yet, yeah me too but they all tied together so it worked.

Today has been a bad day.

I woke up several times last night with a stomach ache and I have no idea what it was from. The first time I woke up I decided immediately I would not be waking up at 5:00 am to make it to master swim. So I turned that alarm off and set another for an hour later, or so I thought. I ended up waking up a whole 15 minutes before I had to be to work. Crap. So I jumped out of bed brushed my teeth and through together an outfit in no time.  I ended up being only 5 minutes late considering but I absolutely hate being late.

And the second I sat at my desk all the problems started. I felt uncomfortable all day, I hated my outfit. I felt like it was unflattering and was the main cause of my being uncomfortable. I keep sitting it weird positions all day trying to disguise my stomach which eventually made my back ache. My hair looked dreadful, I didn’t even have time to put a brush through it. I barely swept any makeup on my face which has been revolting against me and is severely broken out. I felt like I look like a wreak and it really took a toll on me mentally.

With all this going through my brain I could hardly concentrate on the work I should have been doing and instead got caught up on my blog reading. Once I finished reading all the posts in my reader I turned to food to distract me. Now this obviously does make sense, I felt uncomfortable because I felt fat yet food will somehow make me feel better? Well after a few granola bars, a couple cookies, and a pint of ice cream, I did not feel better. Shocking.

I started this blog a couple of months ago as a way to keep track of workouts, track weight loss, and keep myself accountable. I have failed miserably at all three. On April 13th I weighed 153.4 with hopes of being 130 by the end of June. Well, on June 1st I weighed myself hoping to make a fresh start and get back on track, I weighed 164.6, the highest I have ever weighed. I didn’t freak out –or at least I tried not to- I just made myself recommit to my efforts. My last weigh in came in at 152.4 – the first time I have come below my starting weight from April 13th. I had lost 12 pound in 16 days.  This made me the happiest girl in the world and sadly I decided to celebrate the good news with over eating, fail.

Anyways, this post is suppose to be leading to how unhealthy my relationship with food is. I have an all or nothing attitude that needs to change. My weight determines my mood. I skip outings with friends to avoid overeating and drinking. And instead end up overeating another day when I’m feeling lonely. If my pants feel tight it makes me depressed and uncomfortable, and I talk all the time about how I want to lose weight, no matter what the scales says. My lowest weight post high school (I never weighed myself until about a year after I graduated -when I first joined a gym) was 121 and even then I talked about losing more weight.


Right now my biggest goal is to try and obtain a healthy relationship with food. I want to be able to eat just one of the cookies my coworker brought to work, instead of waiting until no one is around and eating 10. I want to be able to eat healthy but not obsessively track my calories because if I eat anything over 1300 all my efforts will be ruining and I will gain weight.

I am commit to having a healthy relationship with food.

Workout Recap

June 21, 2011

6/13: Swim ~1 hr

6/14: Run/ Walk 2 1 m / Weights / Cycle Class

6/15: Swim ~1 hr

6/16: Bike ~10 m / Weights Rest

I took an extra rest day last week because I was feeling exhausted by Thursday and wanted to do nothing except lay in bed and catch up on The Bachelorette J

6/17: Swim ~ 1 hr / Run/Walk 2 m+ 25 min on the elliptical

Something amazing happened on this workout. I went to the gym expecting to walk half a mile warm up, do run 1:30 min / walk 1:00 min intervals for a mile and walk half a mile cool down. This was my expectation because I have not been running in months and have never been able to run very far. Also, on Tuesday I started to attempt to do the same thing but didn’t even run because my feet were bothering me.

Well I walked .40 and started to jog and felt good! I want out of breath and my legs felt strong so I kept going after a 1:30. I ended up running a full mile! and only stopped because my feet were starting to protest. Then I walked .25 of a mile and ran jogged another .25. That’s when the treadmill decided it was time to cool down and get off so I did. Need to actually mess with the settings next time instead of just pressing quick start!

This workout gave me the confidence boost that I have needed.

6/18: Rest Cleaned house – Now that is a workout! haha

6/19: Bike Group ~30 m

This was a tough ride (holy hills!) and sadly my knee really started bothering me by the end of it.I stopped a couple times to stretch and even stopped on the middle of a hill to rest. At one point I thought about walking up the stupid hill but decided it was best to push through it. Probably a bad idea since now my knee hurts when I walk.

I’m going to the bike shop this week to get the fit of my bike analyzed again and look at possibly getting different shoes.

Here is the plan this week, which all depends on how my knee feels:

6/20: Swim ~1 hr

6/21: Run/ Walk 2 m / Weights

6/22: Swim ~1 hr / Easy ~4 m bike

6/23: Bike ~6 m / Weights

6/24: Swim ~ 1 hr / Run/Walk 2 m

6/25: Rest

6/26: Bike Group ~30 m – This ride is supposed to have even more hills than last week!

 I am determined to get in strength training this week as this is probably why I have been having so much troble with my feet and knees.  The reason it has not happened up to this point is because I bought a book that has an entire weight lifiting plan but have not been able to read it yet. Well if I still do not have time this week to read it I will just lift weights on my own. Somrthing is better than nothing right!

In other news…Work, summer school, and working out have been kicking my butt the last month and unfortunately working out comes last on my list of priorities. Obviously blogging comes next…. I’m working on prioritizing my life and hopefully relief will come soon.